Hair

Donovan here. Maybe you've noticed: I've got a bit of a hair problem.

It started about a month ago. My hair -- which had always been thick and lustrous -- began to get a little unruly. It creeped over my ears and stuck up when I got out of the tub.

I didn't think that much of it, until I heard the following at the mall last Saturday from a friendly old lady who walked past my stroller: "Uh, oh, it looks like she lost one of her socks!"

First, I take my own socks off and I knew exactly where it was. Second, she?! That's not what a big burly guy like me wants to hear.

Then, the last straw came when I saw this...



Yeesh. I guess I need a haircut. Fine. I get it. But the problem is this: Mom and Dad aren't exactly Vidal Sassoon, if you know what I mean. Need proof? Look at this disaster:



So what's a guy to do? I could go with the Uncle Bob look (lots of product, with a little ramp in the front, like I'm running into an unseen wall). One thing that ain't happening: I'm not going anywhere near Grandma Coffman's bowl or pasta strainer or whatever she used to use on her kids.

So the only options I can come up with is to just let it go... and wear really manly clothes.